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New AMProSoft Music


by Dawnmarie Fowler

Songs released May 25th


Filename: AMP050IT.ZIP
Title: "No Frogs!"
Filesize: 78,825 bytes
Duration: 2:56

Whoa, what a freakin' great song! I actually found myself humming it as I cleaned Diablo's litterbox. It's got these neat scale wave things, where it goes up a scale and comeback down a whole lotta times. It reminded me of tabagoning with my brother when we were little - climbing up the hill and then hopping on our tabagons and sliding down and them climbing up and sliding down again and again, over and over untill we collapsed from exhaustion. I liked it so much I uploaded to my webpage to make it available for download there too. Check it out.


Filename: AMP051S3.ZIP
Title: "Lockstep"
Filesize: 114,626 bytes
Duration: 2:10

I'm ashamed to admit that when I first heard this song I didn't know what lockstep was. I had to ask AMPro, and if any of you have ever asked AMPro to explain something he has created, you know how he responds - like your the most ignorant creatien ever to crawl (editor's note: I do no such thing -AM). But I endured that embarassment for you, my readers, so that I could tell you this: Lockstep is a whole buncha people walking in unison and uniformity - like marching armies or something, and this song really creates that illusion. It's got a marching steady almost creepy backbeat that's so uniform it nearly sucked me into getting up and marching along. It's not too far of a stretch to see what message AMPro intended when he created Lockstep. Check it out.


Filename: AMP052S3.ZIP
Title: "Medicated Nation"
Filesize: 376,084 bytes
Duration: 1:48

Ok, this one bugged me. Rumor has it AMPro has a really tushie-kicking version of this song WITH VOCALS that is slated for a later release, but all he gave me is the instrumental version. As one usually finds with the instrumental version of any song, it was pretty dry and flat. I kept waiting for something to happen, but zilcho did. I'd save my harddrive space on this one and wait until the vocalized version is released, unless you're the type to actually like to listen to half a song.


Filename: AMP053S3.ZIP
Title: "As Seen on TV"
Filesize: 348,620 bytes
Duration: 2:58

I hated this one. It's rare that I have such an aversive reaction to a song of AMPro's, so you know this is pretty strong here. It's got this creepy crawly jumpy slithery thing going that just reminds me forever of trillions and trillions of spiders and cockroaches and other nasty insect-like creatures scurrying about. It made me feel so gross and itchy all over that I had to interupt writting my article and take a scalding hot shower. I don't recommend it.